Brighter

You know it's been a while since i last blogged before TIGER. So much has happened. So much has changed. My life seemed so dark at times.Looking back on the past year or so i kinda think that i may be getting old. I'm almost mid thirties,Dave is mid thirties and Bruce is officially an old git(god bless ya mate).

There really is only one constant thing in my life right now.It's not my demons,it's not my boys at Northborough,it's not even my shitty existence at work. It's my lovely family.

You realise at some point that life really is very important. Looking at some old photo's only 10 minutes ago made me think that before i had a family , my life really was obsolete. I had a great mum, a great brother,a really amazing family but i can't help but think that i was being prepared for one thing.

MY SON.

MY FAMILY.

Life's lessons teach hard but true.

Experience counts for everything.Loss hurts.Regret causes shame. Experience counts for everything ( see the trend?)

I can now say these words.

I feel no shame nor regret,yet feel experience in my body building.
If you've never met Alex then let me enlighten you. He talks,shouts,sings,dances,kicks footballs,cuddles,kisses and the list goes on.

I do admit that that it's all down to his mother,except for the dancing and kicking balls.

Another person whom i worship but sometimes don't show it.

My life is brighter than it once was.I've just got to take the sunglasses off that i was wearing all those years ago.

MY BEST FRIEND

You know ....... almost 12 years ago i moved from my home to a foreign place.No friends,no job,no family.A loving partner was very welcome but at times on my own without the latter i did cry at night.Then came a bolt out of the blue.Always a canine lover i found myself surprisingly beginning to love a feline. She was such a character.Bounce,Bounce.......boiiiiiiiiing.God damn it where the hell has she gone???

TIGER!!!!!

Man was this pussy cat something.

You know something.... never a true word spoken.You really don't know what you've got till it's gone and boy do i know this now.

This cat actually let me cradle her in my arms like a newborn baby and licked me. She'd comfort me when i cried by rubbing her soft cheek on my body.She'd let me touch her so so pink pads when we played.She'd scratch me but never mean to hurt me.She knew me like nobody else on this planet.

You see when you spend so much time together,so much time being vulnerable and emotional with someone that it turns out that this person knows you better than anybody. How on earth can a cat mean so much to you Andy i hear you ask?

Well i reply with this. This friend of mine will never be replaced by anybody,human or no human. She was my everything.She was my companion.She was my very best friend.

I MISS YOU MATE AND I'LL SEE YOU AGAIN ONE DAY I PROMISE